santos scribes

The line was something about ‘a canyon in her heart’ 

but I heard cannon heart 

and like most things, the more I thought about it 

the more it made sense (to me). 

(like you maybe) I was born in a hospital  

but I came home to live for a short while (at least) 

in the three-story house at One Cannon Square. 

To the best of my knowledge and (internet) sleuthing  

the property was built in the 1870’s

and had been in my mother’s family for decades (1920-ish?) 

The house still stands today, in a place called The Stonington Borough 

(which is as quaint and cavalier as it sounds). 

My parents lived in the third-floor apartment of that house  

when it was owed by my mother’s aunt Mary  

which sounds antecedent and nice  

& if you could see the views out the third-floor apartment  

windows you might say something like “wow, what a thing  

to be able to live in a place like this!” 

A place like 1 Cannon Square. 

The giant cannons (and some of the cannon balls) 

used to defend the sleepy fishing town of Stonington, Connecticut 

(against the British Navy in the War of 1812)  

sit outside the front door of that house, on a small green square. 

The attack didn’t happen until August(8-12^th) 1814 

and the people of Stonington fared & defended themselves well. 

That 3 floor apartment ended up being disadvantageous though  

for my parents I mean  

who both struggled- with walking- 

up stairs or otherwise. 

Both of my parents (Sandy & Ned were their names) 

lived with the (lifelong) lasting effects  

of their Cerebral Palsy births.  

I can’t imagine what a newborn baby added to their mix.  

And still, I can imagine myself there 

in those first weeks and months of my life 

those big empty cannons parked right out front 

in defense of something still

how I wish I could climb right up into their midnight iron 

feel the weight and belonging of their indestruction.  

about this writing

what started as two misheard words, led to all of this… a bit of (my) family history… I appreciate you reading ~ stay well out there xo, Stephanie